Woman Up!

I’ve always hated the expression “man up,” as well as the accompanying implication that being a man means you’re not allowed to be vulnerable or delicate in any way. Even as a toddler, I realized I was different from other boys, and that cultural attitude instilled in me a deep and profound sense of inadequacy, and I was afraid I would be found it, that it would be revealed I wasn’t a “real boy.”

What nonsense all that “man up” bullshit is. We’re all vulnerable and delicate in our own ways. Some are allergic to bee stings, and others are terrified of flying. And we all die eventually.

I understand that sometimes we have to be tough and make hard decisions, but that’s true of all of us, not just those of us with penises. It might be true that men, generally speaking, have more upper body strength, but being able to lift heavy furniture isn’t the only way to be tough or strong. And not all men have that kind of strength and some women do. I’ve never been strong in that way. I’ve never been able to lift heavy stuff, or run the fastest, or knock the ball out of the park. But so the fuck what? I’m strong in other ways. I’ve certainly done things that were difficult. I let strangers cut my head open…twice. I stood beside both of my parents as they died. Those things were hard, but I believed they were the right things to do, so I did them.

Women do hard things all the time. On top of everything else, they’re the ones who have the babies. And they have to put up with the insufferable vanity of men. The idea that men are the strong ones… That’s nothing but vanity. Maybe when we need someone to do something difficult, we should start telling them to woman up.