Ernest Becker was part psychologist and anthropologist and part philosopher. I just read his book The Denial of Death, first published in 1973, and I’m pretty sure his insights are going to stay with me for a long time. This work is 45 years old, and Becker spends a great deal of time framing his theories in the psychodynamic model, so The Denial of Death can seem terribly dated now. His understanding of depression, schizophrenia and homosexuality seem quaint in the twenty-first century, and I don’t think I’ve ever slogged through more passages about penis envy, castration anxiety and the Oedipus complex in my life. But Becker does not simply regurgitate Freud and his peers and descendants, and he moves toward existentialist philosophy throughout.
Although Becker does not come right out and dismiss Freud’s claim that sexuality is the primary driving force motivating humans, he claims that this view is significantly incomplete. Becker believed that it is our finitude, our creatureliness, and specifically our awareness of our own mortality that’s behind most of what we do. One of the funniest and most perceptive comments was his claim that shit is a serious problem for humans. That’s because it reminds us daily that we’re a perishable object, and that one day someone will bury us in the ground before we stink up the place. Sex is only one bodily function that continually points to the fact that we’re flesh and bone.
Becker believed that humans needed meaning and purpose, and they have a strong desire to feel like they’re part of something bigger than themselves…because there’s always that nagging awareness that our bodies will not last. He claimed neurotics have difficulty functioning because they lack illusion. They are too much aware that life has no objective or provable meaning or purpose, and that’s why they find it difficult to go through the motions and why they’re so terrified. They see through the vanity of human institutions, customs and civilization. That struck me as an interesting idea because usually we operate on the assumption that dysfunctional people are screwed up in some way. In any event, the word “neurotic” isn’t used so much these days, and there’s a lot of scientific evidence that biological processes play a big part in mental illness…genetics, brain chemistry, etc. But I think there’s something to this notion that those who have a hard time facing the world—those like me—often can’t buy into society’s bullshit. And I’ve noticed many therapists push their clients toward conformity. Their idea of psychological health is “normalcy.” Why not? They see the vast majority are able to get jobs, get married and have kids, so maybe if their clients follow the pattern, they’ll find the strength to carry on, too. The trouble is, their clients aren’t like other people. They need a new game, something that will spark their imaginations. If they could conform, they probably would.
Becker theorized that the thing that gets us through our lives, knowing we’re going to die, is what he calls our causa sui project. Causa sui is Latin for cause of itself. It’s those things we latch onto and identify with that we believe or pretend or allow ourselves to believe are eternal. These are our passions. Religion is the most obvious causa sui project. Culture, nationality, race, ethnicity and tribalism can also be parts of our causa sui project. But almost anything can be…collecting antiques, sports, cars.
As we grow older, and our mortality sneaks up on us, we might become more strident in our devotion to tradition, law and order, our church and community. It is common knowledge that older people are generally more conservative than younger people. Becker’s theory explains this. And he warns that mere crotchetiness is not the worst of it. Those who believe their causa sui projects are their only hope of avoiding oblivion might, at any age, see anyone who challenges it as their mortal enemy. They might even be willing to kill those who stand against them.
The way to avoid becoming hopelessly fanatical and potentially violent is by consciously facing your mortality. Allow yourself to think about it rather than always pushing it aside. That doesn’t mean you’re going to give up your causa sui project, but on some level, you’ll know and accept that your physical existence and everything you were connected to while alive will eventually turn to dust. You can’t stop this. But you can find a reason to get up in the morning without wanting to kill those who believe and do things differently than you.
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