Skipping At Disney World

I visited Walt Disney World’s Magic Kingdom near Orlando, Florida with my sister and brother-in-law in October, 2004. Toward the end of the day, we found a spot in front of Cinderella’s Castle and waited for the special Halloween parade. We weren’t the only ones. The streets were lined with park visitors, and, of course, the center of the street was kept clear for the parade.

A man and presumably his son took advantage of this open space by skipping back and forth. They weren’t running, or walking or strolling. They were skipping. The son was about 7 or 8, still a little boy but no longer a toddler. The man and the little boy seemed to be having a wonderful time, especially the little boy. As you might expect, they drew some attention. A number of people laughed with delight, and some clapped.

I enjoyed the spectacle, too, and so did my sister…at first. But when she had a chance to think about what she was seeing, she remembered that, according to what she had been taught while growing up, men and boys were not supposed to skip, and fathers, most especially, were not supposed to encourage their sons to do anything deemed “girly”. She said derisively, “That’s weird.”  I asked her what was so weird about it, and she looked at me with a blank expression for a moment–I suppose she wasn’t expecting to be challenged–and finally she said, “You don’t see that, a man skipping with his son.”

I told her that I didn’t care and that I thought it was great. I didn’t allow her to ruin the moment for me. I was 39, so I had a long time to think about the stuff I had been taught when I was young, and I had already come to the conclusion that a lot of it was crap. I had also come to realize that my sister was not the wisest or kindest person around. She is basically a conformist, eager to blend in, and she is quick to join the mob when it turns against someone. She relishes the idea of being a pitchfork wielding villager.  Bless her heart.  (Maybe most of us do on some level.  The mob is very alluring.) 

That’s always been one of the first memories that comes to mind when I think of our last trip to Disney World. It was fantastic to see a father indulge his son in such a way– and in front of a crowd, too–rather than kill his spirit by telling him to act like a man. It was also fantastic that the crowd reacted so positively. Even my sister was happy to see this father and son at first. I think that’s an indication that although these strict rules about what boys are girls are supposed to be like are deeply ingrained in her, as well as many others, they are artificial. We keep those useless rules going with fear, intimidation and sometimes violence. Few want to be thought of as weird, and few want to risk being ostracized or physically harmed.

It’s a nice memory despite my sister’s reaction. I only wish I had had the nerve to invite a complete stranger to skip down the center of the street with me.