He said breathlessly, “Gary, I have this fantasy of being taken on top of a counter…like this one. I want to be left disheveled and smelling of Chinese photinia. I want my cheeks to be flushed with the afterglow. I want people to know simply by looking at my face that a man just had his way with me…right here on this counter.”

I said, “Really? Cool fantasy. …hey, where are your other customers?”

“I put the ‘Out To Lunch’ sign on the door.”

“Well then, I’ll let you eat, dear. I can come back another time.”

Ten years later it hits me. I sit bolt upright in bed in the middle of the night when I realize that was a pass and I totally missed it.